@ToMotherNature wrote to me the other day, "I was talking with a friend the other day and we got to wondering: what are the privacy boundaries between couples? By that I mean: do you close the bathroom door, or do you leave it open no matter what you are doing? She and her husband have no boundaries; my husband and I do. We always close the bathroom door."
It's so interesting that this came up at this point. I recently read The Help where bathroom usage and shared bathroom usage plays an enormous part. It's not at all romantic in the novel but it's crucial.
I live alone with extremely needy animals so, frankly, my door is always open. If I were to choose to close it I know it wouldn't stay that way for even the length of a quick pee. As a matter of fact I actually test the door to make sure it closes properly before company comes. I always (always!) put the lid down when I'm done but never close the door at home. I have close friends who I'm totally comfortable peeing in front of. Too many houses full of people with only one or two toilets, if I've got to pee and you're showering or drying your hair and we both need to leave in 15 minutes then we're going to have to get over it. Hell, we've even shared stalls in public bathrooms if we've felt that we needed a little company.
I do have my lines, though. I don't generally pee in front of anyone else when I have my period because I use pads and there's a level of showing off all that blood that makes me feel weird and I won't poop in front of anyone. For years if there was someone else in a public rest room while I was "dropping the kids off at the pool" I'd have to plug my ears because if I couldn't hear it then I could pretend it wasn't happening...or something. I don't know, welcome to my brain, there is no map so you might want to sprinkle some bread crumbs while you walk.
Whenever this topic comes up I remember the first time a guy took a dump in front of me. We were flirtily hanging out and probably planning to have sex. I think he'd been at work so he decided to take a shower and I was talking to him, sitting on the bathroom counter in the fancy Soho loft where he stayed. Mid conversation he pops out of the tub, sits down and drops one while we chatted. I won't say I was horrified, because I wasn't, but I was damn well surprised, I'll tell you that.
I think it's nice to have the option of your closed bathroom door and to have it respected. For my money, I'd like to know that we can close the door and it will stay that when then one day if the bathroom user feels so comfy that s/he leaves the door open then that's a choice to be made from that side of the doorknob. In other words, don't walk in on me in the bathroom, it won't end well. I keep sharp objects and dangerous chemicals in there and I don't like surprises. Knock, ask, it doesn't cost anything to be polite. Or cautious.
Where are your boundaries on the subject of toileting? More interesting than that why are they?